Question:
> Babies cry. It’s their job. You can either handle the package deal or not. > If you think the crying is getting on *your* nerves, how do you think the > child’s mother feels?
that was pretty insensative. A guy comes looking for help, admits his fualt or short comings, admits he doesn’t know what to do and you decide to be a twat……
Response:
I agree that the colic may be caused by lactose intolerence so the soy formula products are a good idea. As for teething, I’ve found that Cold Pickles, Fruits etc.. Are great teethers and taste good so their more likely to keep them in their mouths. My 8 1/2 month old just got 3 more teeth (making it a grand total of 5) all in one night. I don’t think I could have dealt with it with out using the homeopathic teething tablets that you find at any health food store like wellspring or the such. They are made of Chamomilla and disolve in the mouth like sugar tablets, they are made by Hyland’s Homeopathic Medicine so if you can’t find them at the health food store you can definatley order them from the company. Bessie …Loving being a mommy
Response:
>they are >made by Hyland’s Homeopathic Medicine so if you can’t find them at the health >food store you can definatley order them from the company. >Bessie >…Loving being a mommy
Or you can find them at Walmart. You might have to ask the pharmacist but they do have them there too. — Sophie mom to Charlotte (6/98) Patrick (11/99) #3 due 12/20 See us at www.mcgehees.com
Response:
It’s hard. My baby had a hernia, it turned out to be adult-sized, the doctor said it was the largest one he had ever seen on a child. He was operated upon and thank G-d he is all right. But it’s hard. I remember the older ones saying, daddy yelling at the baby. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Hi. >I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related >crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. >Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old >single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single >male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out >to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also >babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true >hmm). >Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another >side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready for >children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this >has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, and >just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local >Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that >crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. >Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have to >say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I >do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" >"why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t yell, >but my tone of voice may be abrupt. >I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we will >get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but >the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not >want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can >learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue >into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying >inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really REALLY >frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an >honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he is >not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? >Thanks >(if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
> > Oh but they are a package deal, which is why I am here on this newgroup > asking for suggestions on how to cope/adjust with the constant crying, to > make the relationship work. > I won’t even get into the hours upon hours of time I spent fixing up her > home, taking the child out for walks, feeding him, etc. The effort is > certainly there. > If you’re not getting angry with a tiny baby, like some insipid prick, > then what makes you think it’s NOT "working"?? Life is what happens > while you’re trying to perfect it!! > Steve
Hey, Steve, this guy is smart to recognize that this is sending him over the edge. Maybe he CAN’T handle it. Wouldn’t you rather that he admit it and get either some behavior modification help ( by the way Babies are great at the behavior modification of their parents… remember when whatever you did actually WORKED and instead of that awful howl, you got a smile through those tears? There is no better reward!) If indeed, he cannot handle it, and can’t relax enough to calmly find the solution to the kid’s crying trigger, then he needs to know when to walk away. When a kid is shaken, thrown or otherwise injured it is often by an inexperienced bf who tried to take on a responsibility for which he was completely unprepared. At least this guy is admitting to needing some help, and looking for alternatives. If he doesn’t state his questions exactly "right" or shows that he has some rather foolish assumptions about the reality of bringing up a baby ( and perhaps what it means to take on that fundamental responsibility in connection with that OTHER person, the child’s mother and his erstwhile mate), that is part of the journey he needs to make towards being either a single guy or a responsible parent. None of us come with instruction books, you know. Pat
Response:
> Oh but they are a package deal, which is why I am here on this newgroup > asking for suggestions on how to cope/adjust with the constant crying, to > make the relationship work. > I won’t even get into the hours upon hours of time I spent fixing up her > home, taking the child out for walks, feeding him, etc. The effort is > certainly there.
MJ, It’s not that I don’t believe you. I’m not even critical of how much or how little you are doing, as if I *could* have any idea how much that *is*. I continue to get bothered at the undertone I hear, and for all I know I’m dreaming it up. But the undertone I hear is what I keep replying to you about. It sounds as if you think this crying is "somewhat optional" for the child. It sounds as if you think it’s "big of you" to take on a crying child with the mother. Certainly its good. But isn’t your willingness to do this a nonoptional requirement for dating/living with the mother? I mean that. I get this sense, perhaps incorrectly, that you see your willingness as a sort of "added bonus". Barb
Response:
> Oh but they are a package deal, which is why I am here on this newgroup > asking for suggestions on how to cope/adjust with the constant crying, to > make the relationship work.
Go for a decent walk alone when you feel yourself slipping. And I mean "walk" not just "get out of the house." Helped me tremendously to just be able to take a break with a child that screamed herself hoarse every night for the first three months and wouldn’t sleep alone for a year. Then I’d make sure my wife had the same opportunity. And for the "there must be something wrong" crowd: Sure it’s possible something was wrong, but reality was that within a few minutes of 8:30 every night the screaming would just start. From birth onwards. 8:15 she was happy and a joy to be with. 25 minutes later she was inconsolable. Around 5AM she’d be exhausted and fall asleep. 8-9 hours of continuous yelling; I was worried she was going to permanently damage her vocal chords, but that seems to have been unwarranted. G
Response:
I would be concerned if the baby is 7 mo. old and "crying all the time". Have you taken him to the pediatrician? I would to rule out anything serious. Is there a pattern to the crying? Like after a feeding? Is it a recent occurrence? Could be an ear infection? That is why I would go to the pediatrician and talk to him/her about this. You have to be like a detective and find out why. At this young age the baby is crying for a REASON. It is his only way to communicate with you and his mother that he is in discomfort or pain. As for you losing your patience and getting angry, the baby knows this. The baby will pick up on your frustrations and it will only make him cry more. He will feel your frustration and it will scare him and/or make him frustrated too. You are making a bad situation worse. Check this out with a doctor first then go from there. Good luck! Mary Ellen
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hi. > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true > hmm). > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready for > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, and > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have to > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t yell, > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we will > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really REALLY > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he is > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? > Thanks > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
Oh but they are a package deal, which is why I am here on this newgroup asking for suggestions on how to cope/adjust with the constant crying, to make the relationship work. I won’t even get into the hours upon hours of time I spent fixing up her home, taking the child out for walks, feeding him, etc. The effort is certainly there.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Then we would divorce??? who knows… all I know is I am here asking for > advice to help. I could just say ‘to hell with it, YOU deal with him’ but > I’m not. > I guess you could do that. > I just wonder if you were to do that, why take up space in the mom’s life that > she could fill with a guy who could find in himself an attitude of it being a > mutual problem, not *her* problem. > Don’t mind me too much though, I wanted to be a lot more of a parent to my YSD, > and was pushed away by her dad when he wasn’t demanding that "you’re a woman, > help her." And that doesn’t even touch the marital problems I’m having. Again, > I’m the one with the problem, not a problem to him that I have a problem until > it makes his dinner burnt or late. > I do wish I could imagine I was hearing more of a flavor that you understand the > mom and baby as a package deal. > Barb > Barb > > After 2 easy babies, I had a colicky one. It swear he cried for the first > > year straight. The only thing that really helped was giving him a bath or > > going for a drive. All I can say is the DO grow out of it. > > You say the crying baby is killing your relationship. Well, what if you > were > > married, and this was your child, and he still cried all the time? > > > Hi. > > > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the > related > > > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > > > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year > old > > > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a > > single > > > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids > out > > > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I > > also > > > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come > true > > > hmm). > > > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen > > another > > > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready > > for > > > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but > this > > > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, > > and > > > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > > > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know > that > > > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child > communicates. > > > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have > > to > > > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but > I > > > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it > now?" > > > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t > > yell, > > > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > > > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we > > will > > > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, > but > > > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does > not > > > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they > can > > > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will > continue > > > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops > > crying > > > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really > > REALLY > > > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > > > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he > > is > > > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you > suggest??? > > > Thanks > > > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
> Then we would divorce??? who knows… all I know is I am here asking for > advice to help. I could just say ‘to hell with it, YOU deal with him’ but > I’m not.
Then do the right thing and love the child as yours. Me
Response:
> Then we would divorce??? who knows… all I know is I am here asking for > advice to help. I could just say ‘to hell with it, YOU deal with him’ but > I’m not.
Why not? JT
Response:
> Then we would divorce??? who knows… all I know is I am here asking for > advice to help. I could just say ‘to hell with it, YOU deal with him’ but > I’m not.
I guess you could do that. I just wonder if you were to do that, why take up space in the mom’s life that she could fill with a guy who could find in himself an attitude of it being a mutual problem, not *her* problem. Don’t mind me too much though, I wanted to be a lot more of a parent to my YSD, and was pushed away by her dad when he wasn’t demanding that "you’re a woman, help her." And that doesn’t even touch the marital problems I’m having. Again, I’m the one with the problem, not a problem to him that I have a problem until it makes his dinner burnt or late. I do wish I could imagine I was hearing more of a flavor that you understand the mom and baby as a package deal. Barb Barb – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> After 2 easy babies, I had a colicky one. It swear he cried for the first > year straight. The only thing that really helped was giving him a bath or > going for a drive. All I can say is the DO grow out of it. > You say the crying baby is killing your relationship. Well, what if you > were > married, and this was your child, and he still cried all the time? > > Hi. > > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the > related > > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year > old > > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a > single > > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids > out > > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I > also > > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come > true > > hmm). > > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen > another > > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready > for > > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but > this > > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, > and > > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know > that > > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child > communicates. > > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have > to > > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but > I > > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it > now?" > > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t > yell, > > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we > will > > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, > but > > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does > not > > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they > can > > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will > continue > > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops > crying > > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really > REALLY > > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he > is > > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you > suggest??? > > Thanks > > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
Then we would divorce??? who knows… all I know is I am here asking for advice to help. I could just say ‘to hell with it, YOU deal with him’ but I’m not. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> After 2 easy babies, I had a colicky one. It swear he cried for the first > year straight. The only thing that really helped was giving him a bath or > going for a drive. All I can say is the DO grow out of it. > You say the crying baby is killing your relationship. Well, what if you were > married, and this was your child, and he still cried all the time? > Hi. > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a > single > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I > also > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true > hmm). > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen > another > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready > for > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, > and > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have > to > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t > yell, > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we > will > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops > crying > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really > REALLY > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he > is > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? > Thanks > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hi. > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true > hmm). > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another > side of children. The crying all the time side. (snip other)
Get a copy of the baby whisperer. It has some wonderful ideas. — Vicky If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
Response:
>And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not >want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can >learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue >into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying >snip<
I’m in a relationship with a man who is not my child’s father. For awhile he took an aggressive tone when she cried. He would say that she *shouldn’t* cry because it’s *naughty*. For a while I hated him for saying that because it isn’t true. Babies cry because they need something. Yes, sometimes they cry when they are being naughty – but the act of crying itself is not naughty. I just want to give you the ‘mother’s perspective’ on this. I don’t know if your girlfriend is the same, but I felt very possessive over my child. I saw it as ‘this is my baby, not his’. When the baby cried I wanted to deal with it, but I felt like my boyfriend was taking over – every time she cried he would pick her up, take her out of the room and use a…harsh tone of voice with her to try and stop her crying. It broke my heart to see the fear on her face when he did that. Eventually it had to stop. I told him that yes he could be a father-figure to my daughter but he has to do it MY way or he can leave. That really hurt him, but ultimately, she IS mine, NOT his and he needed to remember that we come as a package and if he *can’t* raise my daughter my way then he should find someone else. Things are better now. He took my advice and only tells her off if she is really really naughty and not listening to me! I just wanted you to see how it can sometimes be from the mother’s point of view. If you can get through this crying stage it will all be worth it. If the stress of the crying gets too much then just hand the baby back to it’s mother for awhile. Once they start to walk and do more things, they cry less and get tired more easily. REMEMBER the more stressed out you are, the more the baby will cry. They DO sense other people’s stress. I hope this helps, if only a little! Good Luck, Zoe
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Are these things already on your list of why baby might be crying: > Baby too hot, too cold > Room too hot, too cold > Hungry > Stomach too full, > Gassy > Family’s nerves on edge > Thirsty > Diaper Change > Diaper too tight > Diaper too loose > Diaper rash > Baby’s arms and legs not wrapped closely, feeling of insecurity > Baby’s arms and legs wrapped too closely, feeling of confinement, just like > before *that* experience, labor > Teething > Too tired to sleep > Slept too much, needs activity, interaction > Dark > Light > Boredom
One more thing I would add to that list – although it’s rare, it happened to our little one: a hair, tightly wound around a finger or toe
Response:
After 2 easy babies, I had a colicky one. It swear he cried for the first year straight. The only thing that really helped was giving him a bath or going for a drive. All I can say is the DO grow out of it. You say the crying baby is killing your relationship. Well, what if you were married, and this was your child, and he still cried all the time?
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hi. > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true > hmm). > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready for > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, and > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have to > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t yell, > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we will > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really REALLY > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he is > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? > Thanks > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
> The shoulder sling works, he will stop when I take him outside for a walk. > It is just the times where he in doors and nothing seems to work. Food, > play, talking, picking him up… then I grow frustrated that nothing is > working and frustration turns to anger.
A very good time to swap with the other person. "Here, you hold the baby and feel helpless to stop him crying, while I cook, wash, clean, repair something." I kinda go with the earplugs thing. When my baby screamed, you couldn’t have heard a fire engine parked outside the house. Not that he screamed at that level for hours, but we literally had to write notes or use gestures when he was in full scream. > I’m not sure if this relationship > will ever work out 
Of course babies cry, but it takes people to know how > to handle them… and I sometimes think that isn’t me.
Scuse, but mostly people don’t simply *know* how. They study ahead before they even have children, or they go for the crash course once they have a baby. If *you* go for the crash course, I think the first thing to accept is that you aren’t going to *know* what’s wrong even after you finish the course. You will be prepared with a list of things to try, things to check, that will make you feel less helpless. You will get smarter about what to try first, but that still leaves those times when the baby is crying because the baby feels helpless. Are these things already on your list of why baby might be crying: Baby too hot, too cold Room too hot, too cold Hungry Stomach too full, Gassy Family’s nerves on edge Thirsty Diaper Change Diaper too tight Diaper too loose Diaper rash Baby’s arms and legs not wrapped closely, feeling of insecurity Baby’s arms and legs wrapped too closely, feeling of confinement, just like before *that* experience, labor Teething Too tired to sleep Slept too much, needs activity, interaction Dark Light Boredom Well, there’s more, no doubt, but you won’t get to *know* 100% of the time. You’ll just get better at guessing. Also, when you can get either adult calmed down, the baby will relax that much more. Barb – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> > My daughter was a colicky baby and I oftentime had feelings going > through > > that stage that I could not believe I was actually thinking them!! The > > crying was bad (from 5 to midnight) and I did a few things and > eventually > > she outgrew the colic- here are my ideas: > > 1. Mylicon Drops (OTC) became my best friends…soothed her tummy rather > > quickly. > > 2. Changed formulas until I found one that didn’t make her cry- Lacto > Free > > by the way. > > 3. Held her like a football to put a little pressure on her belly (until > I > > found the drops, this would work for short term). > > He may be too old for colic but maybe not- dd’s colic ended at 4 months. > If > > youthink teething is part of the problem, then give him some baby orajel > or > > make juice ice cubes- that helps. Im lucky that dd’s teething stage was > not > > bad at all. > > Good luck and you’re a good man for being supportive to your g/f…hang > in > > there- it gets MUCH better. > > Connie > I would add that infant massage helped me a lot, and also I had one of > those > ‘over one shoulder’ slings and it was a Godsend. > With hope and heart, > Kathleen
Response:
The shoulder sling works, he will stop when I take him outside for a walk. It is just the times where he in doors and nothing seems to work. Food, play, talking, picking him up… then I grow frustrated that nothing is working and frustration turns to anger. I’m not sure if this relationship will ever work out Of course babies cry, but it takes people to know how to handle them… and I sometimes think that isn’t me. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> My daughter was a colicky baby and I oftentime had feelings going through > that stage that I could not believe I was actually thinking them!! The > crying was bad (from 5 to midnight) and I did a few things and eventually > she outgrew the colic- here are my ideas: > 1. Mylicon Drops (OTC) became my best friends…soothed her tummy rather > quickly. > 2. Changed formulas until I found one that didn’t make her cry- Lacto Free > by the way. > 3. Held her like a football to put a little pressure on her belly (until I > found the drops, this would work for short term). > He may be too old for colic but maybe not- dd’s colic ended at 4 months. > If > youthink teething is part of the problem, then give him some baby orajel > or > make juice ice cubes- that helps. Im lucky that dd’s teething stage was > not > bad at all. > Good luck and you’re a good man for being supportive to your g/f…hang in > there- it gets MUCH better. > Connie > I would add that infant massage helped me a lot, and also I had one of those > ‘over one shoulder’ slings and it was a Godsend. > With hope and heart, > Kathleen
Response:
> The shoulder sling works, he will stop when I take him outside for a walk. > It is just the times where he in doors and nothing seems to work. Food, > play, talking, picking him up… then I grow frustrated that nothing is > working and frustration turns to anger. I’m not sure if this relationship > will ever work out Of course babies cry, but it takes people to know how > to handle them… and I sometimes think that isn’t me.
There is no *magic* type of person who can make a baby stop crying. I never did figure out how to soothe my oldest when she was colicky…she cried, I cried, she got frustrated, I got frustrated, she got older, I got older, she stopped crying, and I stopped crying. Some stuff you just ‘get through’, other stuff you can solve. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> > My daughter was a colicky baby and I oftentime had feelings going > through > > that stage that I could not believe I was actually thinking them!! The > > crying was bad (from 5 to midnight) and I did a few things and > eventually > > she outgrew the colic- here are my ideas: > > 1. Mylicon Drops (OTC) became my best friends…soothed her tummy rather > > quickly. > > 2. Changed formulas until I found one that didn’t make her cry- Lacto > Free > > by the way. > > 3. Held her like a football to put a little pressure on her belly (until > I > > found the drops, this would work for short term). > > He may be too old for colic but maybe not- dd’s colic ended at 4 months. > If > > youthink teething is part of the problem, then give him some baby orajel > or > > make juice ice cubes- that helps. Im lucky that dd’s teething stage was > not > > bad at all. > > Good luck and you’re a good man for being supportive to your g/f…hang > in > > there- it gets MUCH better. > > Connie > I would add that infant massage helped me a lot, and also I had one of > those > ‘over one shoulder’ slings and it was a Godsend. > With hope and heart, > Kathleen
Response:
<snip> It’s hard to know how to deal with a crying child… mine made me feel very frustrated and confused and unconfident when she would have one of those times where she just wouldn’t stop. All I can say, and I know this probably won’t help, but the only thing that got me through it really, was to remember during those times that nothing lasts forever and that she would eventually fall asleep/grow out of it/be able to tell me what was wrong… and she did. It’s tough to deal with a constantly crying baby 
I think, since it isn’t your baby, you should just be open and tell the mom and let her handle it… that way you can watch her methods or whatever and not feel so pressured by the situation… you can also put her more at ease about the "esteem" and "tone" issues. HTH — Pastequesorte "Jesus don’t want me for a sunbeam sunbeams are not made like me…" http://spinning_plates.tripod.com
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> My daughter was a colicky baby and I oftentime had feelings going through > that stage that I could not believe I was actually thinking them!! The > crying was bad (from 5 to midnight) and I did a few things and eventually > she outgrew the colic- here are my ideas: > 1. Mylicon Drops (OTC) became my best friends…soothed her tummy rather > quickly. > 2. Changed formulas until I found one that didn’t make her cry- Lacto Free > by the way. > 3. Held her like a football to put a little pressure on her belly (until I > found the drops, this would work for short term). > He may be too old for colic but maybe not- dd’s colic ended at 4 months. If > youthink teething is part of the problem, then give him some baby orajel or > make juice ice cubes- that helps. Im lucky that dd’s teething stage was not > bad at all. > Good luck and you’re a good man for being supportive to your g/f…hang in > there- it gets MUCH better. > Connie
I would add that infant massage helped me a lot, and also I had one of those ‘over one shoulder’ slings and it was a Godsend. With hope and heart, Kathleen
Response:
What worked with my son was taking him off ALL milk products. I was nursing him at the time and that meant I had to stop eating or drinking dairy products.Come to find out, withing THREE DAYS he was doing vastly better. He’s lactose intolerant. With teething comes a lot of pain. And in my son’s case, ear infections as well. Due to the fact his sinus’s became more active and he couldn’t drain the fluid from his ears. These all pass with time. Unfortunately that doesn’t help the inadequacy you feel while it is going on. If you aren’t in love with that child then you need to leave the relationship. Period. Because that child will ALWAYS be first. My husband fell in love with my son. And I know that even if something happens to us or me, he’ll be there for my son because his relationship is 100% separate from his relationship with me. We have three relationships. His relationship with me, his relationship with my son, and our relationship as a family unit. That is the ONLY way its gonna work. good Luck!! b
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hi. > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true > hmm). > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready for > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, and > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have to > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t yell, > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we will > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really REALLY > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he is > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? > Thanks > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
My daughter was a colicky baby and I oftentime had feelings going through that stage that I could not believe I was actually thinking them!! The crying was bad (from 5 to midnight) and I did a few things and eventually she outgrew the colic- here are my ideas: 1. Mylicon Drops (OTC) became my best friends…soothed her tummy rather quickly. 2. Changed formulas until I found one that didn’t make her cry- Lacto Free by the way. 3. Held her like a football to put a little pressure on her belly (until I found the drops, this would work for short term). He may be too old for colic but maybe not- dd’s colic ended at 4 months. If youthink teething is part of the problem, then give him some baby orajel or make juice ice cubes- that helps. Im lucky that dd’s teething stage was not bad at all. Good luck and you’re a good man for being supportive to your g/f…hang in there- it gets MUCH better. Connie
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hi. > I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related > crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. > Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old > single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single > male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out > to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also > babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true > hmm). > Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another > side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready for > children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this > has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, and > just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local > Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that > crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. > Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have to > say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I > do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" > "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t yell, > but my tone of voice may be abrupt. > I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we will > get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but > the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not > want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can > learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue > into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying > inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really REALLY > frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an > honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he is > not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? > Thanks > (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
Response:
Hi. I am going to post this to relevant newsgroups, please forgive the related crosspost. I want as many answers as I can get. Here is the situation, I’m a 33 year old single male, seeing a 31 year old single mother. First of all, I adore children. I like to think for a single male, I am very good with my time and children. I take my friends kids out to parks, for walks, to the local pond, and to birthday parties. Yes I also babysit them and do up any dishes in the house (a woman’s dream come true hmm). Since seeing the single mother, and her 7 month old son, I have seen another side of children. The crying all the time side. I thought I was so ready for children after playing and spending time with 3-6 year old ones, but this has changed my mind just about. He was born colic and is also teething, and just won’t stop crying it seems. I went so far as to run to the local Chapters store to read up on parenting books and how to cope. I know that crying indicates a problem, and that is the sole way a child communicates. Having already said that I adore children, and demnostrated that, I have to say this crying is driving me batshit. I will not yell at the child, but I do come close. I will turn around and say something like "what is it now?" "why wont you stop crying" "what the hell is wrong with you?". I won’t yell, but my tone of voice may be abrupt. I have tried and tried to be patient, and I know when he gets older we will get along fine. I walk him, play with him and feed him, and adore him, but the crying is agony. And the mother gives me hell everytime. She does not want him to grow up like she did, with a poor esteem. I know that they can learn just from your tone of voice, and she fears that this will continue into his older years as well. I am certain it will end when he stops crying inexplicably. It is just the not knowing why he is crying that really REALLY frustrates and annoys me. In my credit, I like to think I am making an honest effort to find out how to overcome this, and to accept him (as he is not mine), and I really care for the mother. So what would you suggest??? Thanks (if you reply, change noreply.com to canada.com)
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