Pure Parents

Question:

Perhaps put the twin mattress on the floor until he gets used to it. Have you tried letting him fall asleep in Mom’s bed and then moving him to his bed? Sarah Mom to Kalen (8) and Victoria (4 months)

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Anyone have any ideas what to do to get our 2 1/2 year old back in his crib? > He was sick a few weeks ago, and my wife put him in bed with her (because of > snoring, we sleep apart–found it’s better on the marriage to rest than to > see each other first thing in the morning! LOL).  That started the pattern, > and now he won’t stay in his crib all night.  He has a twin bed in his room, > too, but won’t sleep on it without falling off yet (and won’t let us put the > rail on). > My suggestion is the same as we did when he was a year old and we wanted him > to go to sleep without us having to rock him to sleep each night–put him in > bed, check on him every 10 minutes or so while he’s screaming and get him > used to it.  Does that work on 2 1/2 year olds as well? > Joey

Response:

> Perhaps put the twin mattress on the floor until he gets used to it.

Good idea!  And no, we haven’t done that. > Have you tried letting him fall asleep in Mom’s bed and then moving him to > his bed?

Well, no, but the situation is that after we read to him and put him in HIS bed, he’ll stay there for anywhere from 5 minutes to 3 hours, then he starts crying.  When we go in to check on him (or the crying becomes worse), he points to his mom’s room and says "bed, bed, bed"  and the reasoning is over!   Plus, he’s a bit of a light sleeper–moving him after he’s sleeping has not been easy for a long time. Thanks for your input.   "Every good idea is not necessarily one I had", I often say, and moving that matress is a great idea! JcS – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Sarah > Mom to Kalen (8) and Victoria (4 months) > Anyone have any ideas what to do to get our 2 1/2 year old back in his > crib? > He was sick a few weeks ago, and my wife put him in bed with her (because > of > snoring, we sleep apart–found it’s better on the marriage to rest than to > see each other first thing in the morning! LOL).  That started the > pattern, > and now he won’t stay in his crib all night.  He has a twin bed in his > room, > too, but won’t sleep on it without falling off yet (and won’t let us put > the > rail on). > My suggestion is the same as we did when he was a year old and we wanted > him > to go to sleep without us having to rock him to sleep each night–put him > in > bed, check on him every 10 minutes or so while he’s screaming and get him > used to it.  Does that work on 2 1/2 year olds as well? > Joey

Response:

We did this with our now almost 5yo.  We had her take naps on the mattress to get her used to it.  After about a week, we put her to bed on the mattress. That night in the middle of the night, we woke up to her crying.  After checking on her, we found her standing by her crib, holding on to it, crying.  I guess she woke up disoriented and couldn’t figure out how she got out of the crib in the first place.  :-)  But after that one night, we had no problems.  After a couple of weeks with the mattress on the floor, we put it on the frame and added the rails.  No problems there either.  Good luck!! Melissa Mom to Alexandria, 6-19-95, and Kaitlyn, 4-23-99 – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Perhaps put the twin mattress on the floor until he gets used to it. > Good idea!  And no, we haven’t done that.

Response:

>Anyone have any ideas what to do to get our 2 1/2 year old back in his crib? >He was sick a few weeks ago, and my wife put him in bed with

her That started the pattern, >and now he won’t stay in his crib all night.  He has a twin bed in his room, >too, but won’t sleep on it without falling off yet (and won’t let us put the >rail on). >My suggestion is the same as we did when he was a year old and we wanted him >to go to sleep without us having to rock him to sleep each night–put him in >bed, check on him every 10 minutes or so while he’s screaming and get him >used to it.  Does that work on 2 1/2 year olds as well?

It might work, although at his age he may just climb out of the crib and come to you. Why don’t you try sitting with him in his room, pat him, sing to him, what ever comforts him. When he gets used to being back in his bed you can gradually reduce it until you don’t have to be in the room until he’s asleep. Also, I would definitely ask him if he’d rather be on the mattres on the floor rather than in the crib. Or you could try getting a frame for a toddler bed (although it would still require a bed-rail) Maybe he’d prefer the small bed to the  twin for a while. Good Luck! >Joey

Susan http://havinganotherbaby.com * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!

Response:

Joey ~ Been there.  During the teething process we let out daughter sleep with us a lot.  We liked it, she LOVED it, but of course she came to prefer it and getting her back to her own crib was brutal. You’ll be in for a rough 3 or 4 nights but bite the bullet and do it.  Put the rail on and just do it.  The longer you let your child stay in be with you the more difficult it will be to get him to sleep in his own bed again. Personally, I wouldn’t even check on him as frequently as you mentioned. if he’s pitching a fit, just talk to him loudly from you own bed saying "Daddy is here, now go to bed!" You feel heartless but you have to be firm.  It only gets harder.  We’ve been there. Jeannie

Response:

> Of course, you could just do what most people do and have always done and keep her > in your bed.  Why this strange need to have kids in their own beds. > Robert Davidson

Absolutely! Steve – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Joey ~ > Been there.  During the teething process we let out daughter sleep with us a > lot.  We liked it, she LOVED it, but of course she came to prefer it and > getting her back to her own crib was brutal. > You’ll be in for a rough 3 or 4 nights but bite the bullet and do it.  Put the > rail on and just do it.  The longer you let your child stay in be with you the > more difficult it will be to get him to sleep in his own bed again. > Personally, I wouldn’t even check on him as frequently as you mentioned. if > he’s pitching a fit, just talk to him loudly from you own bed saying "Daddy is > here, now go to bed!" > You feel heartless but you have to be firm.  It only gets harder.  We’ve been > there. > Jeannie

Response:

Why the strange need to have them in YOUR bed? I guess it depends on the age. We used to live in an apartment complex where a woman had her son (who STILL NURSED!!!! – SICK!!!!) sleeping in her bed at age 5.  This woman was as bad as her son.  The kid was a devil child and the mother was ALWAYS explaining his actions away.  I wouldn’t be surprised if this kid ends up a murderer some day, he was so bad. I could tell stories.  UGH!!! AJPDLA

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Of course, you could just do what most people do and have always done and keep her > in your bed.  Why this strange need to have kids in their own beds. > Robert Davidson > Joey ~ > Been there.  During the teething process we let out daughter sleep with us a > lot.  We liked it, she LOVED it, but of course she came to prefer it and > getting her back to her own crib was brutal. > You’ll be in for a rough 3 or 4 nights but bite the bullet and do it. Put the > rail on and just do it.  The longer you let your child stay in be with you the > more difficult it will be to get him to sleep in his own bed again. > Personally, I wouldn’t even check on him as frequently as you mentioned. if > he’s pitching a fit, just talk to him loudly from you own bed saying "Daddy is > here, now go to bed!" > You feel heartless but you have to be firm.  It only gets harder.  We’ve been > there. > Jeannie

Response:

Of course, you could just do what most people do and have always done and keep her in your bed.  Why this strange need to have kids in their own beds. Robert Davidson – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Joey ~ > Been there.  During the teething process we let out daughter sleep with us a > lot.  We liked it, she LOVED it, but of course she came to prefer it and > getting her back to her own crib was brutal. > You’ll be in for a rough 3 or 4 nights but bite the bullet and do it.  Put the > rail on and just do it.  The longer you let your child stay in be with you the > more difficult it will be to get him to sleep in his own bed again. > Personally, I wouldn’t even check on him as frequently as you mentioned. if > he’s pitching a fit, just talk to him loudly from you own bed saying "Daddy is > here, now go to bed!" > You feel heartless but you have to be firm.  It only gets harder.  We’ve been > there. > Jeannie

Response:

> Why the strange need to have them in YOUR bed?

That is the normal situation, so it is strange to call it strange.  The majority of kids under three have always slept with their mum. > I guess it depends on the age. > We used to live in an apartment complex where a woman had her son (who STILL > NURSED!!!! – SICK!!!!) sleeping in her bed at age 5.

Recent physiological studies have demonstrated that it is only very recently that kids were not nursed until at least two and up to seven – the evidence is their in our bodies!  Most foraging societies still feed their kids at the breast until about four.  In other words, it’s entirely normal to breastfeed a five-year-old, as most informed paediatricians I’ve spoken to have informed me. > This woman was as bad > as her son.  The kid was a devil child and the mother was ALWAYS explaining > his actions away.  I wouldn’t be surprised if this kid ends up a murderer > some day, he was so bad.

That’s sad.  I don’t think the cosleeping would have much to do with it though. I know plenty of kids who have slept with their parent till that age and they are all angels. Careful with prejudice against certain parenting practices, especially this one as it is the majority situation, therefore normal. Robert Davidson

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Why the strange need to have them in YOUR bed? > That is the normal situation, so it is strange to call it strange.  The majority > of kids under three have always slept with their mum. > I guess it depends on the age. > We used to live in an apartment complex where a woman had her son (who STILL > NURSED!!!! – SICK!!!!) sleeping in her bed at age 5. > Recent physiological studies have demonstrated that it is only very recently > that kids were not nursed until at least two and up to seven – the evidence is > their in our bodies!  Most foraging societies still feed their kids at the > breast until about four.  In other words, it’s entirely normal to breastfeed a > five-year-old, as most informed paediatricians I’ve spoken to have informed me. > This woman was as bad > as her son.  The kid was a devil child and the mother was ALWAYS explaining > his actions away.  I wouldn’t be surprised if this kid ends up a murderer > some day, he was so bad. > That’s sad.  I don’t think the cosleeping would have much to do with it though. > I know plenty of kids who have slept with their parent till that age and they > are all angels. > Careful with prejudice against certain parenting practices, especially this one > as it is the majority situation, therefore normal. > Robert Davidson

I agree completely! I’m shocked, Robert, this has happened twice now! Steve

Response:

> Careful with prejudice against certain parenting practices, especially this one > as it is the majority situation, therefore normal.

I don’t really have a problem with the way in which people raise their own children; for they will do what’s best for their children as they see it, no matter what anyone else says.  I should hope, at least. However, attachment parenting (is this what we’re talking about?  Or a form of it?) raises some serious co-dependency issues in my mind with regards to the way the child will grow up, as well as some co-dependency issues that the parents seem to think can be resolved through attachment parenting. It’s a kind of sad "circle of life," IMHO.  Some of these people are real fanatical about it.  But, again, it’s their family and they will do what they will.  I’m not really prejudiced one way against the other; but I do have opinions. AJPDLA

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Careful with prejudice against certain parenting practices, especially > this one > as it is the majority situation, therefore normal. > I don’t really have a problem with the way in which people raise their own > children; for they will do what’s best for their children as they see it, no > matter what anyone else says.  I should hope, at least. > However, attachment parenting (is this what we’re talking about?  Or a form > of it?) raises some serious co-dependency issues in my mind with regards to > the way the child will grow up, as well as some co-dependency issues that > the parents seem to think can be resolved through attachment parenting. > It’s a kind of sad "circle of life," IMHO.  Some of these people are real > fanatical about it.  But, again, it’s their family and they will do what > they will.  I’m not really prejudiced one way against the other; but I do > have opinions. > AJPDLA

Co-dependency, the darling buzzword of antisex sexuophobes for a complex of neuroses, is caused by abuse, not by love or interpersonal attachment. Such things are not as simple as what words SOUND like. Dependency has NO more to do with Co-dependency than tension has to do with hypertension, or THE cold with A cold. It’s pop nonsense. It all goes back to the erroneous belief of the cruel, that being kind to people makes them weak. Steve

Response:

> Why the strange need to have them in YOUR bed? > I guess it depends on the age. > We used to live in an apartment complex where a woman had her son (who STILL > NURSED!!!! – SICK!!!!) sleeping in her bed at age 5.  This woman was as bad > as her son.  The kid was a devil child and the mother was ALWAYS explaining > his actions away.  I wouldn’t be surprised if this kid ends up a murderer > some day, he was so bad.

WOW, I guess you don’t have any prejudices!!! (NOT). Listen, there is absolutely nothing sick about a five year who’s still nursing. Many are now recommending child-led weaning, which usually happens anytime between the ages of 2 and 7-8 years old. Most children will self-wean between the age of 2.5 and 4.5 years old, but there are some who will self-wean very early and others who will go on nursing for a little older. There’s nothing wrong with an older child still nursing and chances are that those children are a lot healthier than the majority of children since they are getting essential nutriants from their mother’s milk, as well as having their immune system boosted by mom’s antibodies. As far as co-sleeping is concerned, there is absolutely no reason a child should sleep alone, unless the child wants to. — Danielle, Writing from Canada Visit my new web-page, view new pics of the kids, and, please, sign my guest-book!! http://members.tripod.com/~dchenier/home.html My ICQ # is 6463692 Canadian Special Education Chat Room – http://members.tripod.com/~dchenier/Canspec &canspec ICQ # 33710657

Response:

I’m not talking about "attachment parenting" but about "normal parenting" – ie how most people have always done it and still do it.  That is, sleeping the child with the mother, breastfeeding until at least two and carrying the child for the first one or two years.  This is normal, and what most people have always done. Robert Davidson – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Careful with prejudice against certain parenting practices, especially > this one > as it is the majority situation, therefore normal. > I don’t really have a problem with the way in which people raise their own > children; for they will do what’s best for their children as they see it, no > matter what anyone else says.  I should hope, at least. > However, attachment parenting (is this what we’re talking about?  Or a form > of it?) raises some serious co-dependency issues in my mind with regards to > the way the child will grow up, as well as some co-dependency issues that > the parents seem to think can be resolved through attachment parenting. > It’s a kind of sad "circle of life," IMHO.  Some of these people are real > fanatical about it.  But, again, it’s their family and they will do what > they will.  I’m not really prejudiced one way against the other; but I do > have opinions. > AJPDLA

Response:

Anyone have any ideas what to do to get our 2 1/2 year old back in his crib? He was sick a few weeks ago, and my wife put him in bed with her (because of snoring, we sleep apart–found it’s better on the marriage to rest than to see each other first thing in the morning! LOL).  That started the pattern, and now he won’t stay in his crib all night.  He has a twin bed in his room, too, but won’t sleep on it without falling off yet (and won’t let us put the rail on). My suggestion is the same as we did when he was a year old and we wanted him to go to sleep without us having to rock him to sleep each night–put him in bed, check on him every 10 minutes or so while he’s screaming and get him used to it.  Does that work on 2 1/2 year olds as well? Joey

Response: