Question:
Why would I wonder that? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Ever wonder why you’re such a troll? >No. Ever wonder why someone gets away with wiping the floor with YOUR kid?
Response:
How did she get away with it ? you dodo!!!! he’s not there anymore!!!!! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Ever wonder why you’re such a troll? >No. Ever wonder why someone gets away with wiping the floor with YOUR kid?
Response:
Teachers and parents can help, but it’s mostly your son’s job to work out his peer relationships. If this chick is bullying him, he needs to learn how to discourage her physically. Teach him to lash out when she singles him out. Stomp her foot. Punch her out. He might not win every round, but he CAN discourage her from preying on him. He’s too easy and too much fun for her to stop with just talk.
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and a > half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a small > town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before in a > large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful there > but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem qualified > for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now > zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older and > my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at him > and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the teacher > and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away somehow and > resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc or > whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 seconds of > agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going into the > kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat together. > I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told her > like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said well > it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and > discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took my son > home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was watching > the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son having > to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes too > small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for it, > she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his eyes > are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had banged > his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was > reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go talk > to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk to > her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just not > happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As far > as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from this ? > Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees for > this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I > just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some > basis for even reporting them! > Any ideas? > Thanks for listening > S
Response:
Ever wonder why you’re such a troll? Yes, because their parents ALLOW it. Thank you, thats what I’m saying too. She picks on all of them, the reason shes singled him out lately is because shes figured out that the teacher, who has your same predjudice mentality. feels he is weaker and has singled him out and wont protect him and the reason for her predjudice is because I’m a single mother. It’s not because he IS weaker, it’s because she has allowed him to be singled out. She thinks she knows what he ‘needs’ and she knows nothing and I want nothing to do with it. All you’re doing is accusing my boy of not being tough enough at four because of… your ‘own’ predjudice, which you can’t get out of your mind can you? you’re picking a fight with me right elaine? Yes, people got picked on for reasons, because of their race, because of their handicap, because of their color because of predjudice. Then there are some who become bullies to everyone because of their own rough background. What made you predjudice? there must be some ignoramous in your background who made you this way. I know he may be in a weaker position with regard to OTHER people singling him out and treating him different( including teachers) because he has no dad and people like this woman are refusing to validate my position but it doesn’t mean he IS a weaker person and my route on this is not to teach him to he has to fight more than everyone else but to keep him in quality private school, understand? And quite frankly elaine, you’re full of shit, my dad was a golden gloves boxer, you want to talk about fighting and learning how to fight? I’d like to compare notes with ya. The plain fact is that you have no information on who ends up being a victim with regard to some psychological factor. Most people left public school feeling like a victim in some way, who were you in school? one of the chosen few? get real. I was encouraged to fight, showed to fight and believe me, I did fight my way out of situations in school and was taught this by my dad who IS a boxer. So what are you talking about? I’m tough, and know all about that, are you elaine? Were you some supreme being in school who noone messed with and the bully in the field just backed right off of ya? Why was that, what set you apart as superior was it because you were so good at hitting back or telling the other kids straight or minding your own business or what?? What was your technique???? Let’s hear it. Or is it because you stayed on top of it all by your own prejudice? kind of like you do now. You are exactly the type of people I intend to go out my way to teach my son to avoid. HAHA Troll!!!! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >The plain fact of the matter is that only certain kids end up victims. The >girl knows better than to pick on some kids. Ever wonder why that was? >because their PARENTS allow it. > Fuck you elaine > >Make an exception. A four year old can hit a girl like this bully. > >> Thats right cause hes way smaller and the teacher won’t do anything. I > >dont > >> want him hitting girls and when hes bigger im sure no girls will be > >bullying > >> him. > >> >Teachers and parents can help, but it’s mostly your son’s job to work > out > >> >his peer relationships. > >> >If this chick is bullying him, he needs to learn how to discourage her > >> >physically. Teach him to lash out when she singles him out. Stomp her > >foot. > >> >Punch her out. He might not win every round, but he CAN discourage her > >from > >> >preying on him. He’s too easy and too much fun for her to stop with >just > >> >talk. > >> >> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four >and > >a > >> >> half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in >a > >> >small > >> >> town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in >before > >in > >> a > >> >> large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful > >> there > >> >> but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem > >> >qualified > >> >> for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > >> >> teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she > has > >> >now > >> >> zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year > older > >> >and > >> >> my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces >at > >him > >> >> and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the > >> >teacher > >> >> and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away > >somehow > >> >and > >> >> resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc >etc > >or > >> >> whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 > >seconds > >> >of > >> >> agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going > >into > >> >the > >> >> kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat > >> >together. > >> >> I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and >told > >her > >> >> like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She >said > >> well > >> >> it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together >and > >> >> discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I >took > >my > >> >son > >> >> home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was > >> >watching > >> >> the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son > >> having > >> >> to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like >hes > >> too > >> >> small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse > for > >> >it, > >> >> she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his > >eyes > >> >> are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she >had > >> >banged > >> >> his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he >was > >> >> reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him >go > >> >talk > >> >> to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to > talk > >> to > >> >> her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am > just > >> >not > >> >> happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. > As > >> >far > >> >> as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected >from > >> this > >> >? > >> >> Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees > >for > >> >> this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening > >but > >> I > >> >> just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there >is > >> some > >> >> basis for even reporting them! > >> >> Any ideas? > >> >> Thanks for listening > >> >> S
Response:
Fuck you elaine – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Make an exception. A four year old can hit a girl like this bully. > Thats right cause hes way smaller and the teacher won’t do anything. I >dont > want him hitting girls and when hes bigger im sure no girls will be >bullying > him. > >Teachers and parents can help, but it’s mostly your son’s job to work out > >his peer relationships. > >If this chick is bullying him, he needs to learn how to discourage her > >physically. Teach him to lash out when she singles him out. Stomp her >foot. > >Punch her out. He might not win every round, but he CAN discourage her >from > >preying on him. He’s too easy and too much fun for her to stop with just > >talk. > >> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and >a > >> half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a > >small > >> town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before >in > a > >> large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful > there > >> but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem > >qualified > >> for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > >> teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has > >now > >> zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older > >and > >> my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at >him > >> and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the > >teacher > >> and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away >somehow > >and > >> resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc >or > >> whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 >seconds > >of > >> agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going >into > >the > >> kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat > >together. > >> I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told >her > >> like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said > well > >> it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and > >> discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took >my > >son > >> home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was > >watching > >> the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son > having > >> to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes > too > >> small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for > >it, > >> she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his >eyes > >> are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had > >banged > >> his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was > >> reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go > >talk > >> to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk > to > >> her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just > >not > >> happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As > >far > >> as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from > this > >? > >> Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees >for > >> this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening >but > I > >> just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is > some > >> basis for even reporting them! > >> Any ideas? > >> Thanks for listening > >> S
Response:
news.ops.worldnet.att.net>, "Elaine Gallant" >If this chick is bullying him, he needs to learn how to discourage her >physically. Teach him to lash out when she singles him out. Stomp her foot. >Punch her out. He might not win every round, but he CAN discourage her from >preying on him.
This kind of physical self-defence starts at home. Dad/Mom must impose the reality of school life by demonstrating physical behaviour in the home. To expect that a wimp child (like we are dealing with here) can become the hard liner he must to survive, with no precedent set in the home, is being unfair to the wimp child. Ben * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!
Response:
She’s WAY bigger and she’s psychotic and going after him with scissors and banging his head into things right out of the blue and constantly teasing him and getting in his face and everyone elses. Hitting is not the answer to her, she’s one of those other kinds of bullies that you don;t want to fight with. It might give him a feeling of satisfaction etc. etc. and I know where you’re coming from but first of all he’s doesn’t WANT to do it, he’s too scared to do it and second of all I have lost all interest in pursuing this particular situation. I’m not going to pressure him into hitting her. the other ones have avoided her out of luck, except one other kid now who is also terrified to go in there. If it’s not him it’ll be someone else. He’s not going to change her. I was taught to pick my fights carefully, he can go through this some other time. The decision on this own is to blow it off. Any feeling of satisfaction he gets from hitting her will be short lived I can assure you. Where do you think hitting her will get him? This kid is not going to be discouraged for any length of time by that, if the teacher can’t stop her why would he be able to? The joke is that she knows there is no authority in there that’s why she is such a menace and it’s too bad they all have to put up with it. Believe me, my kid isn’t the only one, its miserable for all of them. The sum total of it is is that I’m not forking over money for him to spend his mornings with five other kids and the only thing they are learning is what to say and do about this one kid and learning how to cope with someone elses shit everyday. You’re thing might work if the teacher was backing him up and it was an isolated incident and there was 20 other kids there but thats not this situation. There’s five kids who can’t do anything without her in their face constantly and nothing is done about it. They refuse to put any effort into stopping it, don’t have the skills to stop it and my kid is now out of the loop. If this was school, she would be in alot more trouble as I don’t think even regular schools tolerate physical violence on an ongoing basis. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Make an exception. A four year old can hit a girl like this bully. > Thats right cause hes way smaller and the teacher won’t do anything. I >dont > want him hitting girls and when hes bigger im sure no girls will be >bullying > him. > >Teachers and parents can help, but it’s mostly your son’s job to work out > >his peer relationships. > >If this chick is bullying him, he needs to learn how to discourage her > >physically. Teach him to lash out when she singles him out. Stomp her >foot. > >Punch her out. He might not win every round, but he CAN discourage her >from > >preying on him. He’s too easy and too much fun for her to stop with just > >talk. > >> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and >a > >> half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a > >small > >> town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before >in > a > >> large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful > there > >> but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem > >qualified > >> for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > >> teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has > >now > >> zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older > >and > >> my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at >him > >> and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the > >teacher > >> and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away >somehow > >and > >> resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc >or > >> whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 >seconds > >of > >> agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going >into > >the > >> kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat > >together. > >> I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told >her > >> like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said > well > >> it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and > >> discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took >my > >son > >> home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was > >watching > >> the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son > having > >> to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes > too > >> small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for > >it, > >> she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his >eyes > >> are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had > >banged > >> his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was > >> reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go > >talk > >> to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk > to > >> her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just > >not > >> happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As > >far > >> as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from > this > >? > >> Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees >for > >> this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening >but > I > >> just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is > some > >> basis for even reporting them! > >> Any ideas? > >> Thanks for listening > >> S
Response:
’she’s’ got it handled. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> > Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? I > > would take it to the preschool director. > > Kimberly > > "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly." > I agree. Since you have decided to pull your son, I would send a letter to > the director detailing exactly why you are pulling your son out of the > school. A letter through the mail lets you vent your frustrations, gives > them something to put in their files and lets you not have to go back into > the school. If they are accredited through the state, there has to be some > agency you can report this to. Call the elementary school. They will be > able to tell you who is "over" the preschool. Then send a copy of the > letter you write to the director to whoever is over the preschool. > This whole thing is a mess! > Sharon >a letter which focuses on one or two things will however have more impact >than one that just whines about everything — when Mom has 43 different >complaints and compares this one horse montessori with the ‘big city’ etc, >SHE sounds like the idiot rather than the school being in err. if she >wants the director to take her seriously, she will focus in on the central >issue to her so she doesn’t sound like a general malcontent.
Response:
Thanks for the information! There is only one class, etc. etc. it’s hokey, they have a director/owner but he’s whatever and she’s the only teacher for the morning and afternoon, two days a week there is only one kid in the class, the other three there’s five. I’ve looked at it more like babysitting too but now this has happened and it’s just ridiculous because it doesn;t even qualify for babysitting. Anyway, it’s my own fault for getting involved in it, I took a job here and thought he’d be better in this montessori than none since we are moving back and at least he’d have his second year. Whatever, it was a mistake and it didn;t work out and there is no point arguing with them or anything else. I may report it though depending on what I find out. This teacher had a lot of chances to ‘rectify’ the problem but no skills to do it so there’s no hope for that. It’s useless, it’s over, too bad my boy had to get hurt but its done now and thats that!! Thanks for validating my position on what montessori is all about, there really is alot of difference and I’m not an idiot for noticing that, they shouldnt be allowed to run this, it’s a hard adjustment for kids to go through when its something so different and montessori is very aware of that too, the mistake I made was thinking this could work at all. I dont even know about keeping him in mont. anymore, i mean its really good but its a huge adjustment from anything else once they (and I) get used to it and this has pretty much tainted the experience. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and a >half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a small >town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before in a >large city. >Unfortunately, anyone can call a school a *montessori* school. If >the school is accredited and associated with the national assocation >of Montessori schools, you might want to send a letter to them as >well. If they are not a true Montessori school, it is also possible >that the following organization can help stop them from claiming >status as a montessori school. >http://www.montessori-namta.org/ >You can find your state’s regulations for daycares and preschools >at this website and also find out the office to which your letter >should be sent. >http://nrc.uchsc.edu/states.html >Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful there >but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem qualified >for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school >teacher. >Anyone can start a preschool. However, if she is licensed by the >state and not adhering to the standards, it may be possible to close >her down on that basis. >From what you said in other posts, I am confused about this – is >this the only classroom or are their other classrooms? Does the >school have a director? If so, then follow people’s suggestion to >send her a letter that explains why you are taking your son out >of the school also. This will give her a chance to rectify the >situation and to give you some satisfaction in terms of refunding >tuition if she understands your position. >ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now >zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older and >my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at him >and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the teacher >and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away somehow and >resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc or >whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 seconds of >agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going into the >kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat together. >I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told her >like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said well >it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and >discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took my son >home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was watching >the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son having >to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes too >small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for it, >she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his eyes >are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had banged >his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was >reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go talk >to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk to >her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just not >happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As far >as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from this ? >Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees for >this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I >just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some >basis for even reporting them! >Any ideas? >Thanks for listening >S >Since Montessori schools often group 3 to 5 year olds together and >since this is a very small class, I’m not sure what the teacher is >doing. You mentioned in another post that the class consists of >only 5 children most days and on some days only one child. This >sounds more like a babysitting service than a school to me. The >montessori philosophy provides a great deal of *individual* work for >children with very structured toys and there is not a great deal of >*free play* or group activities where kids interact with other kids >without teacher supervision. When children do interact in groups, >usually the teacher is leading an activity and demonstrating the way >in which a particular montessori toy or learning tool is supposed to >be used.
THank you! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->At any rate, as a preschool teacher, I will tell you that our >teachers in classrooms of 20 children do not allow children to >bully others. We do have a *peace table* where the children can >talk to each other and settle conflicts, but we monitor this and >they can call a teacher in as a mediator if any of the children >cannot handle settling the dispute peacefully. The idea is to help >them practice negotiation skills, but to guide them when they need >help and not to allow any violence on the part of any of the >students. >Dorothy >There is no sound, no cry in all the world >that can be heard unless someone listens .. >source unknown
Response:
>Hi Susie!!!
Uh, Neesa, put down the bong before you reply. I am not Susie, thank the Lord. Ben * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I agree with you which is why I’m not saying anything about montessori or > anything else and have decided just to leave it with a letter. The > montessori thing is just my other observation which makes me not care for > the school that much anyway. They dont want to hear anything about any of > that, it’s just what I see which makes it hard to accept what they’re > offering up. The part I really dont like is that they allow this to go on > and that the ‘teacher’ specifically didn’t hear what I said and also that > these things happened last week and she didn’t tell me what was going on > when I picked my son up and asked her, instead said everything was fine. > The letter will explain the specific reason he’s no longer attending and > that will be the end of it. As far as the fees go, well I guess I’ll have to > ask for them back due to the unfortunate circumstances around which my son > will no longer be able to attend, namely, his personal safety! > No biggie, he’s out of it and I hope this doesn’t happen to him in school > but by then circumstances will be different and he’ll be a little older. The > only reason he’s in preschool is for some supposed benefit but if he’s going > through hell over there- forget it! It’s of no value. > Thks fo the input
sounds like a smart move — hope you can find something better for your son. When I was looking for places for mine, I ran across plenty of places I would never have used — and did take my son out of one that was better in theory than in practice. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->> > Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? > I >> > would take it to the preschool director. >> > Kimberly >> > "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly." >> I agree. Since you have decided to pull your son, I would send a letter > to >> the director detailing exactly why you are pulling your son out of the >> school. A letter through the mail lets you vent your frustrations, > gives >> them something to put in their files and lets you not have to go back > into >> the school. If they are accredited through the state, there has to be > some >> agency you can report this to. Call the elementary school. They will be >> able to tell you who is "over" the preschool. Then send a copy of the >> letter you write to the director to whoever is over the preschool. >> This whole thing is a mess! >> Sharon >a letter which focuses on one or two things will however have more impact >than one that just whines about everything — when Mom has 43 different >complaints and compares this one horse montessori with the ‘big city’ etc, >SHE sounds like the idiot rather than the school being in err. if she >wants the director to take her seriously, she will focus in on the central >issue to her so she doesn’t sound like a general malcontent.
Response:
Susie, we just went thru something Very Similar with our 4 yo boys and a child that was actually younger but Very Violent. I ended up simply pulling the boys from the school. It was better for them, to heck with the other kid, although I do wish he could have gotten some help, but my boys safety and happiness came first. It was a tough go for a while there though, with trying to get the teacher to realize there was even a problem. Oh Well!! Hang in there and be comfortable with your decision. As the director of our former co-op (montessori wannabe) preschool said when I pulled out "You are your childs best advocate and you have to do what you feel is best for them". We did, I did, and we are all the better for it. Good Luck!! ~L
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and a > half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a small > town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before in a > large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful there > but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem qualified > for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now > zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older and > my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at him > and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the teacher > and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away somehow and > resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc or > whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 seconds of > agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going into the > kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat together. > I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told her > like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said well > it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and > discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took my son > home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was watching > the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son having > to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes too > small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for it, > she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his eyes > are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had banged > his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was > reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go talk > to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk to > her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just not > happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As far > as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from this ? > Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees for > this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I > just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some > basis for even reporting them! > Any ideas? > Thanks for listening > S
Response:
Another casualty of "new parenting". And another example of "new parenting", Monty Python version called "Run away, run away." When your child is more concerned about coming home to get his ass kicked for cowardice, he/she will stand his ground at school. Ben * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!
Response:
Hi Susie!!! Having alredy dealt with this with my son, who will be 5 in a couple of months, I know the aggravation you are feeling. Luckily, in my situation the teacher DID pull the child from any activities where she would be near my son. This girl was a BRAT!! And, like one of the other posts mentioned, I also bet you are not the only one. Many other parents had complained to the teacher before I did. I would definetly be writing that letter to the director of the school, and calling the board of education regarding the teacher’s practices. I’m not sure of this, but you may be able to lodge a complaint with the teacher’s union, if she is a registered teacher. (I imagine she is) Good luck and I hope that your son has a better experience with his teacher next year!!! Neesa * Sent from RemarQ http://www.remarq.com The Internet’s Discussion Network * The fastest and easiest way to search and participate in Usenet – Free!
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? I > would take it to the preschool director. > Kimberly > "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly." > I agree. Since you have decided to pull your son, I would send a letter to > the director detailing exactly why you are pulling your son out of the > school. A letter through the mail lets you vent your frustrations, gives > them something to put in their files and lets you not have to go back into > the school. If they are accredited through the state, there has to be some > agency you can report this to. Call the elementary school. They will be > able to tell you who is "over" the preschool. Then send a copy of the > letter you write to the director to whoever is over the preschool. > This whole thing is a mess! > Sharon
a letter which focuses on one or two things will however have more impact than one that just whines about everything — when Mom has 43 different complaints and compares this one horse montessori with the ‘big city’ etc, SHE sounds like the idiot rather than the school being in err. if she wants the director to take her seriously, she will focus in on the central issue to her so she doesn’t sound like a general malcontent.
Response:
> Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? I > would take it to the preschool director. > Kimberly > "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly."
I agree. Since you have decided to pull your son, I would send a letter to the director detailing exactly why you are pulling your son out of the school. A letter through the mail lets you vent your frustrations, gives them something to put in their files and lets you not have to go back into the school. If they are accredited through the state, there has to be some agency you can report this to. Call the elementary school. They will be able to tell you who is "over" the preschool. Then send a copy of the letter you write to the director to whoever is over the preschool. This whole thing is a mess! Sharon
Response:
> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. The teacher doesnt seem > qualified > for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now > zeroed in on my son. > Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I > just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some > basis for even reporting them! > Any ideas? > Thanks for listening > S
Hi! I work in preschool (2.5 – 5 yr olds) I think your instincts over this situation are absolutely correct. The preschool teacher’s kills certainly seem to be out of date – which is the kindest thing I can possibly say about her. She has dismissed your views, failed to protect your child and allowed him to be hurt by another child, far beyond what I would see as ‘usual’ preschool pushing and jostling which frequently goes on (but, even so, has to be discouraged.) No way should she encourage your son to ‘confront’ the bully alone. She should be in control of the children – not allowing the laws of the jungle to apply! She should be fully involved, helping them *both* to negotiate, and protecting them *both* from harm. I wonder what she was doing whilst the girl was hitting and pushing your child about – it sounds as if there were some pretty sustsained attacks. (Maybe the ‘eyes in the back of her head’ are faulty!) Certainly, if this happened to my child, I would not let him go back there. He is learning to be a victim, and learning that adults will not protect him. These are not good ’survival skills’ in modern school life. I think you should ask about the qualifications of the teacher, and point out, to someone in authority, that children are not being adequately protected at the preschool. (I live in the UK so I don’t know who registers and oversees preschools where you live.) Certainly you should try to get your money back. Ask around other parents and see if anyone else is concerned about standards at the preschool. These days, preschools should be listening carefully to the views of parents, and respecting their wishes. You have been treated badly, and I caan’t believe you are the only one. Good luck Kay
Response:
Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? I would take it to the preschool director. Kimberly "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly."
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and a > half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a small > town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before in a > large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful there > but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem qualified > for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now > zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older and > my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at him > and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the teacher > and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away somehow and > resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc or > whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 seconds of > agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going into the > kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat together. > I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told her > like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said well > it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and > discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took my son > home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was watching > the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son having > to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes too > small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for it, > she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his eyes > are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had banged > his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was > reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go talk > to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk to > her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just not > happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As far > as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from this ? > Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees for > this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I > just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some > basis for even reporting them! > Any ideas? > Thanks for listening > S
One: Begin a lawsuit to recover damages and fees. Two: Begin picketing the school everyday till they settle. Three: Invite the newsmedia. Four: Find out where she lives and picket her there! Steve
Response:
Hmm. Well, he’ll be going back to his old school for next year, so no worries on this one for awhile. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I agree with you which is why I’m not saying anything about montessori or > anything else and have decided just to leave it with a letter. The > montessori thing is just my other observation which makes me not care for > the school that much anyway. They dont want to hear anything about any of > that, it’s just what I see which makes it hard to accept what they’re > offering up. The part I really dont like is that they allow this to go on > and that the ‘teacher’ specifically didn’t hear what I said and also that > these things happened last week and she didn’t tell me what was going on > when I picked my son up and asked her, instead said everything was fine. > The letter will explain the specific reason he’s no longer attending and > that will be the end of it. As far as the fees go, well I guess I’ll have to > ask for them back due to the unfortunate circumstances around which my son > will no longer be able to attend, namely, his personal safety! > No biggie, he’s out of it and I hope this doesn’t happen to him in school > but by then circumstances will be different and he’ll be a little older. The > only reason he’s in preschool is for some supposed benefit but if he’s going > through hell over there- forget it! It’s of no value. > Thks fo the input >sounds like a smart move — hope you can find something better for your son. >When I was looking for places for mine, I ran across plenty of places I >would never have used — and did take my son out of one that was better in >theory than in practice. > >> > Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? > I > >> > would take it to the preschool director. > >> > Kimberly > >> > "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly." > >> I agree. Since you have decided to pull your son, I would send a letter > to > >> the director detailing exactly why you are pulling your son out of the > >> school. A letter through the mail lets you vent your frustrations, > gives > >> them something to put in their files and lets you not have to go back > into > >> the school. If they are accredited through the state, there has to be > some > >> agency you can report this to. Call the elementary school. They will be > >> able to tell you who is "over" the preschool. Then send a copy of the > >> letter you write to the director to whoever is over the preschool. > >> This whole thing is a mess! > >> Sharon > >a letter which focuses on one or two things will however have more impact > >than one that just whines about everything — when Mom has 43 different > >complaints and compares this one horse montessori with the ‘big city’ etc, > >SHE sounds like the idiot rather than the school being in err. if she > >wants the director to take her seriously, she will focus in on the central > >issue to her so she doesn’t sound like a general malcontent.
Response:
Thats right cause hes way smaller and the teacher won’t do anything. I dont want him hitting girls and when hes bigger im sure no girls will be bullying him. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Teachers and parents can help, but it’s mostly your son’s job to work out >his peer relationships. >If this chick is bullying him, he needs to learn how to discourage her >physically. Teach him to lash out when she singles him out. Stomp her foot. >Punch her out. He might not win every round, but he CAN discourage her from >preying on him. He’s too easy and too much fun for her to stop with just >talk. > Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and a > half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a >small > town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before in a > large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful there > but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem >qualified > for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has >now > zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older >and > my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at him > and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the >teacher > and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away somehow >and > resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc or > whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 seconds >of > agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going into >the > kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat >together. > I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told her > like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said well > it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and > discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took my >son > home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was >watching > the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son having > to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes too > small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for >it, > she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his eyes > are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had >banged > his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was > reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go >talk > to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk to > her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just >not > happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As >far > as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from this >? > Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees for > this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I > just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some > basis for even reporting them! > Any ideas? > Thanks for listening > S
Response:
Unfortunately, he’s basically the same as her so that’s useless. He just started this school and is convinced it will be a success simply because it’s a ‘montessori’ school, I have no idea what format they are really using thouugh as they are just being taught how to sit still in their desks, sit with their hands in their lap in the circle, raise their hand before talking, don’t talk to their ‘neighbors’, do ’show and tell’, do one controlled craft, have a snack, go outside and then come home. Sometimes instead of craft they ‘use’ the montessori materials! Oh well, whatever, it’s over, anyways, this guy probably can’t get a qualified teacher here and he won’t deal anything because he needs everything to be ok for the enrollment, it’s awful and its over. But I will write a letter before we leave here. THks for the advice. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? I >would take it to the preschool director. >Kimberly >"If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly."
Response:
I agree with you which is why I’m not saying anything about montessori or anything else and have decided just to leave it with a letter. The montessori thing is just my other observation which makes me not care for the school that much anyway. They dont want to hear anything about any of that, it’s just what I see which makes it hard to accept what they’re offering up. The part I really dont like is that they allow this to go on and that the ‘teacher’ specifically didn’t hear what I said and also that these things happened last week and she didn’t tell me what was going on when I picked my son up and asked her, instead said everything was fine. The letter will explain the specific reason he’s no longer attending and that will be the end of it. As far as the fees go, well I guess I’ll have to ask for them back due to the unfortunate circumstances around which my son will no longer be able to attend, namely, his personal safety! No biggie, he’s out of it and I hope this doesn’t happen to him in school but by then circumstances will be different and he’ll be a little older. The only reason he’s in preschool is for some supposed benefit but if he’s going through hell over there- forget it! It’s of no value. Thks fo the input – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> > Is the teacher the only person you have spoke to regarding this matter? I > > would take it to the preschool director. > > Kimberly > > "If you don’t give your heart wings, you will surely never fly." > I agree. Since you have decided to pull your son, I would send a letter to > the director detailing exactly why you are pulling your son out of the > school. A letter through the mail lets you vent your frustrations, gives > them something to put in their files and lets you not have to go back into > the school. If they are accredited through the state, there has to be some > agency you can report this to. Call the elementary school. They will be > able to tell you who is "over" the preschool. Then send a copy of the > letter you write to the director to whoever is over the preschool. > This whole thing is a mess! > Sharon >a letter which focuses on one or two things will however have more impact >than one that just whines about everything — when Mom has 43 different >complaints and compares this one horse montessori with the ‘big city’ etc, >SHE sounds like the idiot rather than the school being in err. if she >wants the director to take her seriously, she will focus in on the central >issue to her so she doesn’t sound like a general malcontent.
Response:
Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. My son is four and a half and is in this ‘montessori’ (supposedly) preschool, but its in a small town so its kind of a hokey school, not like the one he was in before in a large city. Anyways, I don;t think he’s learning anything too useful there but to top it off its really expensive and the teacher doesnt seem qualified for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now zeroed in on my son. Shes about a head taller than him and a year older and my son is scared of her. She has been hitting him and making faces at him and just constantly scaring him and harrassing him. I talked to the teacher and asked her to kindly watch over my son and keep this kid away somehow and resolve the problem. As in don;t have her sitting next to him etc etc or whatever you have to do. THis day was a field trip day, within 10 seconds of agreeing to this, I noticed her with my son and this same kid going into the kids grandparents van and putting the two of them in the backseat together. I couldnt believe it ! so I went over there and took him out and told her like did we not have this conversation about 10 seconds ago. She said well it was the only ride and all the parents will have to get together and discuss the issue to which I replied that its NOT my issue and I took my son home. Anyways, it seemed like it got better the next day as she was watching the kid and I explained to her at one point that I dont want my son having to confront this kid (which she seems to think he should do), like hes too small and hes too scared of her and she just makes fun of him worse for it, she agreed and then last week I get my son and he looks pale and his eyes are kind of wide so I knew something happened and sure enough she had banged his head into another kids head and was grabbing his chin when he was reading, then I find out that the teachers solution was to have him go talk to her and confront her. Im so pissed off, my son said he tried to talk to her but she kept looking at the wall and making faces at him. I am just not happy with this whole deal and what a rip off, i want my money back. As far as I know aren’t preschool age children supposed to be protected from this ? Does anyone have any ideas about what I should, Ive prepaid the fees for this and Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some basis for even reporting them! Any ideas? Thanks for listening S
Response:
LOL – yes ‘the eyes at the back of the head’ have failed. That is exactly how she talks! The funnier part of it is is its really low enrollment, there’s only FIVE kids in this class most days and the other days its just her and the bully all day!. ANyways, I’ve got the full picture, this is a losing proposition, we’re out. Thanks so much for the feedback, sometimes its hard to get the full perspective on these things when you get caught up in the situation. Since I have had run ins with them before, my tact is going to be to just take my son out, no word, no notice, no follow-up and they can KEEP the money for the last month, thats how little I want to deal with or get into a useless argument with this old-fashioned bunch, they will never see my point of view because they’re antiquated. But I am going to phone the BBB about it or maybe just leave a letter with the director. Personally I wouldn’t care what they do in their preschools or their schools as its their business they are old-fashioned but forget these high fees and trying to make it out like something it isn’t and now I’m pissed that my son got hurt like that!! We are going back to the bigger city. Thanks for the feedback everyone, very helpful! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Does anyonehave any input for me on this situation. The teacher doesnt seem > qualified > for montessori or for preschool. Shes more like an elementary school > teacher. ANyways, theres a girl in there who is quite nasty and she has now > zeroed in on my son. > Im really disappointed that this is what ended up happening but I > just dont want to take him there ever again and plus I think there is some > basis for even reporting them! > Any ideas? > Thanks for listening > S >Hi! >I work in preschool (2.5 – 5 yr olds) >I think your instincts over this situation are absolutely correct. The >preschool teacher’s kills certainly seem to be out of date – which is the >kindest thing I can possibly say about her. She has dismissed your views, >failed to protect your child and allowed him to be hurt by another child, far >beyond what I would see as ‘usual’ preschool pushing and jostling which >frequently goes on (but, even so, has to be discouraged.) >No way should she encourage your son to ‘confront’ the bully alone. She should >be in control of the children – not allowing the laws of the jungle to apply! >She should be fully involved, helping them *both* to negotiate, and protecting >them *both* from harm. I wonder what she was doing whilst the girl was hitting >and pushing your child about – it sounds as if there were some pretty sustsained >attacks. (Maybe the ‘eyes in the back of her head’ are faulty!) >Certainly, if this happened to my child, I would not let him go back there. He >is learning to be a victim, and learning that adults will not protect him. >These are not good ’survival skills’ in modern school life. I think you should >ask about the qualifications of the teacher, and point out, to someone in >authority, that children are not being adequately protected at the preschool. >(I live in the UK so I don’t know who registers and oversees preschools where >you live.) >Certainly you should try to get your money back. Ask around other parents and >see if anyone else is concerned about standards at the preschool. These days, >preschools should be listening carefully to the views of parents, and respecting >their wishes. You have been treated badly, and I caan’t believe you are the >only one. >Good luck >Kay
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