Question:
>My principal suggested I skip ahead a grade, but my parents didn’t >want that, because they thought I would be ’socially behind’ and >wanted me to be ‘like normal kids.’ Well, Surrounded by kids my own >age, but that weren’t at my intellectual level, I couldn’t relate to >them anyway. Then my principal suggested ‘independent study,’ and my >parents thought it wasn’t structured enough. Thinking back, I think >the structure is when kept me back. >So I would suggest, that if a teacher or principal gives your kid an >opportunity to go at their natural pace, take it. >—Linda
Amen–very good advice. I must say, however, your experiences were a bit atypical–the principals and teachers are usually NOT the ones providing the "out". I was able to start school a year early, but when it became apparent that that did not help enough, my parents BEGGED the administration to let me skip 3rd grade. "We don’t allow that in this system" blah blah blah. Of course, they gave all the standard excuses: he’ll be behind socially, etc, etc. My Dad told them "He’s behind socially NOW, he get beat up every day and you can’t do anything about it, so what difference does it make???" I know very few gifted kids who were well-adjusted socially. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, but the stereotype of the "nerdy misfit" has some basis in fact. Don’t let them use socialization as an excuse for holding back your child academically. Frank Beautiful Downtown Beverly, MA KA1WZH "I live in New York, New York, city that never shuts up"–Ani DeFranco "All alone beneath the starless summer sky"–Marshall Crenshaw "Turn off your mind, relax and float downstream"–Lennon/McCartney
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I don’t know what an average baby at 18 months should comprehend since she > is my first, please explain. How do you know your 18 month old is > "gifted", what behavioral signs do you see? Genetically, my daughter > should be better than average, but how do I know? > You seem to understand the perils of being "gifted", if you had to do your > childhood over, how would you tell your parents to help you? What would > have prevented you from being bored in school? > I am curious about the term "gifted" since it appears to be the criteria > for which my child will be evaluated to get into some of the private > schools in NYC. > Thanks in advance for your input.
According to an article in today’s Parade magazine on raising exceptionally gifted children, children with IQ’s of 130-180 are considered "gifted". In the U.S. there are about 3 million gifted children. So obviously there’s a very wide range here. I would expect the private schools to start with the IQ, then have their own criteria. Judging from the response to this thread, however, IQ tests and "labeling" at such an early age can do more harm than good. Gina Vener
Response:
>You seem to understand the perils of being "gifted", if you had to do your >childhood over, how would you tell your parents to help you? What would >have prevented you from being bored in school?
My principal suggested I skip ahead a grade, but my parents didn’t want that, because they thought I would be ’socially behind’ and wanted me to be ‘like normal kids.’ Well, Surrounded by kids my own age, but that weren’t at my intellectual level, I couldn’t relate to them anyway. Then my principal suggested ‘independent study,’ and my parents thought it wasn’t structured enough. Thinking back, I think the structure is when kept me back. So I would suggest, that if a teacher or principal gives your kid an opportunity to go at their natural pace, take it. —Linda
Response:
I don’t know what an average baby at 18 months should comprehend since she is my first, please explain. How do you know your 18 month old is "gifted", what behavioral signs do you see? Genetically, my daughter should be better than average, but how do I know? You seem to understand the perils of being "gifted", if you had to do your childhood over, how would you tell your parents to help you? What would have prevented you from being bored in school? I am curious about the term "gifted" since it appears to be the criteria for which my child will be evaluated to get into some of the private schools in NYC. Thanks in advance for your input.
Response:
I would hesitate to apply the word "gifted" to a child that young. Children advance at different rates, and while your two year old may be ahead of the others right now, that will probably even out in the future as the others catch up. Aslo, advances may be made in one area, and not in others. Some children have anatural talent for math, for example, but have difficulty reading. My advice would be to encourage your child in all areas, letting her advance at the pace she feels comfortable with.
Response:
>I would like to add my two cents worth coming from the perspective of >having been tested and found to be "gifted" when I was around 7 years >old. >From that point on, I was put into a different classroom every once in a >while, usually with no warning. Then I was expected to learn mathematics >at a level that I’m still not ready for even though I’m now 27! >Some of the other "benefits" were having teachers tell my parents that >they were afraid of me and my intelligence and other kids taunting me >for being different.
AMEN!!! I usually don’t quote this much of a message, but I couldn’t have said it better myself. Nothing quite like your teachers telling your fellow classmates how smart you are to alienate them… Especially when you’re a girl, sad to say. Amy Mother of John (7/31/95) and Joseph (10/25/96)
Response:
>Please, please be very sure that this is a label that you want attached >to your child at this age. It really doesn’t get you much except >pressure in school. And generally, most early labeled ‘gifted’ children >have their peers catch up with them in junior high school and then >suddenly, the ‘gifted child’ is no longer so special and actually has to >work for those A’s now.
I disagree. It happens in college. High school was SOOOOOOOOOOO easy that I just plain never learned how to study. Then in Nuclear Power School it was straight lectures, so a no-brainer there, but now I have to study to qualify watches and I can’t!!! oh well. Z
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