Pure Parents

Question:

Thanks for all your replies. I didn’t expect so many to participate. The general feeling seems to be that it’s acceptable, even in our modern age, to behave courteously in a particular way to women, *without* there being some implicit notion of superiority/inferiority/whatever in the gesture. One final point about showing everyone the same courtesy. A few years ago, when we were holidaying in Italy, we were crossing a lake in a small boat. I got off first, helped my wife, then my two daughters, finally I put my hand out to my son (around 13 at this stage). He glowered at me, and said "I can manage". Behaving in the same way to everyone is not the piece of cake it might seem. For me (and hopefully my son) showing courtesy to all, but particular courtesies to women is the way to go. Old fashioned? Maybe. But look how cold our ‘modern’ customs have made some people. I’d like to see rudeness and lack of courtesy branded unAmerican. But then of course to some that’s just a joke term anyway. Mick

Response:

>One final point about showing everyone the same courtesy. A few years >ago, when we were holidaying in Italy, we were crossing a lake in a >small boat. I got off first, helped my wife, then my two daughters, >finally I put my hand out to my son (around 13 at this stage). He >glowered at me, and said "I can manage".

But isn’t that pretty typical of someone that age?  They are becoming their own person.  If they feel that someone offering help is … perhaps condecending, they might take offense. I’m not sure that this would indicate that one shouldn’t offer the help, though. >I’d like to see rudeness and lack of courtesy branded unAmerican. But >then of course to some that’s just a joke term anyway.

From what I have heard of French waiters, they can pretty much top any rudeness or lack of courtesy that we might exhibit. (apologies to my French friends.  It was only rummor) — Do not underestimate your abilities.  That is your boss’s job. It is your job to find ways around your boss’s roadblocks.

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