Pure Parents

Question:

I remember when my now four year old daughter was a toddler, she threw food on the floor, too. When she turned 17-18 months old and was doing it for fun or because she didn’t want any particular food, I would take her down from the high chair and make her pick up the food she’d thrown on the floor. I would tell her "no throwing food". Eventually, she got tired of having to pick up the food (I wouldn’t let her back into her high chair until she picked it all up) and left everything she didn’t want on her tray. I think it took a good couple of months of consistently maknig her pick up the food, but over that course of two months, it happened less and less until she stopped doing it completely.) Don’t know if this would work for you but if you try it, good luck. Susan

Response:

Janet, I thought of you when I saw this message.  I am so glad this worked so well for you.  And it’s nice to see you passing on the help to others.  Enjoy those beautiful children of yours! Take Care! Vicki Surratt Proud Mom of Kathy (6) and Jenny (9)! Visit my website!  http://www.vickishome.com Home of the Newsgroup Photo Album! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Confession time.  My three loved this and over the course of almost a year > and a half they reduced me to tears, spanking, screaming and just about > every other lousy parenting behavior that I normally abhor. > Finally, when they were almost 2.5, I posted here and was told:  END THE > MEAL IMMEDIATELY.  No ifs, buts, whys or wherefores.  No need to get angry. > No need to shout.  No second chances.  No make-it-up snack later.  Just END > IT with a cheery "oh I guess you’re not hungry then". > It worked in under a week … and no, contrary to my fears, there was no > whining about being hungry, no sleep lost because of tiny tummies rumbling > in the middle of the night … and minimal backsliding later (maybe two > incidents each in six months — and I just did the same thing again, > although now I make them pick up the tossed stuff on the way out). > I can *highly* recommend it.  An a.p.s Golden Guarantee comes with *this* > advice.  :-o

Response:

Hmmmm… I think you’ve gotten a lot of good advice here…however, I just want to offer some slightly off-topic advice. It’s completely normal for kids to play with their food. They learn a lot from feeling it, smooshing it, etc.  It’s tactile learning.  One thing my husband did occasionally with my stepson, because he couldn’t stand to let Garrett make a huge mess with his food when he was a toddler, was to cover the floor in a huge number of towels, then fill Garrett’s tray with warm water and gave him spoons and forks and plastic dishes and some bathtub toys.  Garrett splashed and played and had a grand time.  It gave him a chance to play with his utensils without making a food mess. Cath Weeks – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray. I am going insane with this. Ryan > did the same thing & I wasn’t clever enough to get him to stop. I actually > stopped putting certain foods on his plate b/c I was just sick of getting on > my hands & knees each evening & cleaning the whole kitchen floor, walls & > appliances ( applesauce has a pretty amazing spray radius). >  Now Sarah at 17 months is doing the same. If she doesn’t like it, or is not > interested or if she is * all done*>>>>she hurls away. (At times I do manage > to grab her dish  knowing that she is finished her meal.) >  I don’t want to stop giving  Sarah veggies like I did w/ Ry b/c he threw > them. I keep reintroducing her to foods hoping she will start liking some > veggies. It is not a veggie thing though, tonight she wasn’t hungry ( I > guess) & thew the whole plate on the floor. She also likes to let her milk > leak out of her sippy cup & play with it, both of them seem to like making > messes & playing w/ their food. I have no problems w/ Ryan now, he is 3 & is > very good at the table. >  I sit w/ my kids each evening for dinner but I usually don’t enjoy mine or > get to finish it. DH isn’t home til much later so I am alone w/ this. > Any words of wisdom anyone? Thanks ~ Ginny > Grub*67 > "Some people think we put that we put our life on hold to raise a child > but we know that to hold a child is life"

Before you buy.

Response:

>To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray.

<snip> Food and utensils you’re going to be stuck picking up till the phase is over. Kaitlyn is going through it and I use a bowl that has a suction ring around the bottom.  Most of the time she can’t pick it up, although there have been times when she has.   It reduces the problem somewhat though. Kendra Proud to be "Outlandish"! http://www.crosswinds.net/~outlandish http://www.crosswinds.net/~graphicsbykendra (under construction) *Something to consider* Amatures built the ark, professionals built the Titanic

Response:

> >To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray.

dishes fly, food flies — dinner is over.  First time — restore food when consequence upsets dinner pitcher.  After that, dinner is over, kid is down.   [and don't give a free shot every meal -- once the concept is grasped then throwing food means dinner is over on the first pitch] Obviously this does not apply to incompetent eating i.e. natural food dropping and mess — but to deliberate tossing of stuff over side.

Response:

;>To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray. ; ;<snip> ; ;Food and utensils you’re going to be stuck picking up till the phase is over. ;Kaitlyn is going through it and I use a bowl that has a suction ring around the ;bottom.  Most of the time she can’t pick it up, although there have been times ;when she has.   It reduces the problem somewhat though. We have one of those bowls as well. But, our high chair’s tray is _textured_ (who the heck thought that was a good idea?) just enough that the bowl can’t make a seal. It works great at restaurants, but at home it doesn’t work. Is mise le meas, |  Darryl L. Pierce Alt.Atheism Member #1142, Death ‘Piper of the BAAWA  | |   Visit me @ http://welcome.to/mcpiarais && http://welcome.to/gaeilge  | |        "What do you care what other people think, Mr. Feynman?"        | |   Unsolicited email to this address is acceptance of a $500 per day    | |   storage fee to be paid within 30 days of the sending of the email.   |

Response:

Me too (!) — Evenflo advertised the trays as "easy clean", which sounded good to me at the time (buying three).  But which I guess really just means "non-stick even when you want them to". Aaagh. –Janet Elliot, Hanna, Connor  (10/21/96) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> We have one of those bowls as well. But, our high chair’s tray is > _textured_ (who the heck thought that was a good idea?) just enough > that the bowl can’t make a seal. It works great at restaurants, but at > home it doesn’t work.

Response:

Hi Ginny.     I can only tell you what worked for us…we switched Brandon from his high chair to the bar stools we eat on at our counter.  He eats with the big people now and does beautifully!  He doesn’t throw any food on the floor…he uses his fork and spoon, and he says "down" when he’s all done. He just slides his plate and cup away from him.  It is really amazing. Something I have learned about me as a parent is that I’m not all that quick when it comes to realizing that my child is growing up and that the baby ways just don’t cut it anymore.  Good luck to you.  Oh, something else we used to do with Brandon during the messy days, we would ignore the behavior we found undesirable.  The less attention he received, the less he wanted to keep doing it.  I also couldn’t eat meals with him.  I literally had to sit in the next room, around the corner and he would eat nicely and talk to himself.  The moment I was in front of him, everything became one big funny game.  Good luck. — Sarah-mom to Brandon (18 mos) & Camryn (she’s 3 mos) Come visit us at http://home.maine.rr.com/brancam/home.htm – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray. I am going insane with this. Ryan >did the same thing & I wasn’t clever enough to get him to stop. I actually >stopped putting certain foods on his plate b/c I was just sick of getting on >my hands & knees each evening & cleaning the whole kitchen floor, walls & >appliances ( applesauce has a pretty amazing spray radius). > Now Sarah at 17 months is doing the same. If she doesn’t like it, or is not >interested or if she is * all done*>>>>she hurls away. (At times I do manage >to grab her dish  knowing that she is finished her meal.) > I don’t want to stop giving  Sarah veggies like I did w/ Ry b/c he threw >them. I keep reintroducing her to foods hoping she will start liking some >veggies. It is not a veggie thing though, tonight she wasn’t hungry ( I >guess) & thew the whole plate on the floor. She also likes to let her milk >leak out of her sippy cup & play with it, both of them seem to like making >messes & playing w/ their food. I have no problems w/ Ryan now, he is 3 & is >very good at the table. > I sit w/ my kids each evening for dinner but I usually don’t enjoy mine or >get to finish it. DH isn’t home til much later so I am alone w/ this. >Any words of wisdom anyone? Thanks ~ Ginny >Grub*67 >"Some people think we put that we put our life on hold to raise a child >but we know that to hold a child is life"

Response:

Thanks to all for your advice I have to admit I nearly fell off my chair laughing at the thought of Sarah picking up the food off the floor & nearly croaked at the idea of putting her to bed hungry. She is only 17 months!!! BUT if you say it works alas I will try it/ all of the above cured Ryan of these escapades but he was 2.5 at the time. This afternoon they played outside for 3 hrs & came to the table starving. I offered pizza & salad (their favorite) so no battles tonight YEAH! I will start our new meal time rituals tomorrow. I had sar eat at the big table tonight & I think she actually did do better as a result of this. Ginny P.S Thanks for *not* asking me if I was a bad cook. LOL! I was sure someone was going to! — Grub*67 "Some people think we put that we put our life on hold to raise a child but we know that to hold a child is life"

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray. I am going insane with this. Ryan > did the same thing & I wasn’t clever enough to get him to stop. I actually > stopped putting certain foods on his plate b/c I was just sick of getting on > my hands & knees each evening & cleaning the whole kitchen floor, walls & > appliances ( applesauce has a pretty amazing spray radius). >  Now Sarah at 17 months is doing the same. If she doesn’t like it, or is not > interested or if she is * all done*>>>>she hurls away. (At times I do manage > to grab her dish  knowing that she is finished her meal.) >  I don’t want to stop giving  Sarah veggies like I did w/ Ry b/c he threw > them. I keep reintroducing her to foods hoping she will start liking some > veggies. It is not a veggie thing though, tonight she wasn’t hungry ( I > guess) & thew the whole plate on the floor. She also likes to let her milk > leak out of her sippy cup & play with it, both of them seem to like making > messes & playing w/ their food. I have no problems w/ Ryan now, he is 3 & is > very good at the table. >  I sit w/ my kids each evening for dinner but I usually don’t enjoy mine or > get to finish it. DH isn’t home til much later so I am alone w/ this. > Any words of wisdom anyone? Thanks ~ Ginny > Grub*67 > "Some people think we put that we put our life on hold to raise a child > but we know that to hold a child is life"

Response:

To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray. I am going insane with this. Ryan did the same thing & I wasn’t clever enough to get him to stop. I actually stopped putting certain foods on his plate b/c I was just sick of getting on my hands & knees each evening & cleaning the whole kitchen floor, walls & appliances ( applesauce has a pretty amazing spray radius).  Now Sarah at 17 months is doing the same. If she doesn’t like it, or is not interested or if she is * all done*>>>>she hurls away. (At times I do manage to grab her dish  knowing that she is finished her meal.)  I don’t want to stop giving  Sarah veggies like I did w/ Ry b/c he threw them. I keep reintroducing her to foods hoping she will start liking some veggies. It is not a veggie thing though, tonight she wasn’t hungry ( I guess) & thew the whole plate on the floor. She also likes to let her milk leak out of her sippy cup & play with it, both of them seem to like making messes & playing w/ their food. I have no problems w/ Ryan now, he is 3 & is very good at the table.  I sit w/ my kids each evening for dinner but I usually don’t enjoy mine or get to finish it. DH isn’t home til much later so I am alone w/ this. Any words of wisdom anyone? Thanks ~ Ginny Grub*67 "Some people think we put that we put our life on hold to raise a child but we know that to hold a child is life"

Response:

Confession time.  My three loved this and over the course of almost a year and a half they reduced me to tears, spanking, screaming and just about every other lousy parenting behavior that I normally abhor. Finally, when they were almost 2.5, I posted here and was told:  END THE MEAL IMMEDIATELY.  No ifs, buts, whys or wherefores.  No need to get angry. No need to shout.  No second chances.  No make-it-up snack later.  Just END IT with a cheery "oh I guess you’re not hungry then". It worked in under a week … and no, contrary to my fears, there was no whining about being hungry, no sleep lost because of tiny tummies rumbling in the middle of the night … and minimal backsliding later (maybe two incidents each in six months — and I just did the same thing again, although now I make them pick up the tossed stuff on the way out). I can *highly* recommend it.  An a.p.s Golden Guarantee comes with *this* advice.  :-o –Janet Elliot, Hanna, Connor (10/21/96)

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> To STOP throwing food/dishes off her tray. I am going insane with this. Ryan > did the same thing & I wasn’t clever enough to get him to stop. I actually > stopped putting certain foods on his plate b/c I was just sick of getting on > my hands & knees each evening & cleaning the whole kitchen floor, walls & > appliances ( applesauce has a pretty amazing spray radius). >  Now Sarah at 17 months is doing the same. If she doesn’t like it, or is not > interested or if she is * all done*>>>>she hurls away. (At times I do manage > to grab her dish  knowing that she is finished her meal.) >  I don’t want to stop giving  Sarah veggies like I did w/ Ry b/c he threw > them. I keep reintroducing her to foods hoping she will start liking some > veggies. It is not a veggie thing though, tonight she wasn’t hungry ( I > guess) & thew the whole plate on the floor. She also likes to let her milk > leak out of her sippy cup & play with it, both of them seem to like making > messes & playing w/ their food. I have no problems w/ Ryan now, he is 3 & is > very good at the table. >  I sit w/ my kids each evening for dinner but I usually don’t enjoy mine or > get to finish it. DH isn’t home til much later so I am alone w/ this. > Any words of wisdom anyone? Thanks ~ Ginny > Grub*67 > "Some people think we put that we put our life on hold to raise a child > but we know that to hold a child is life"

Response: