Pure Parents

Question:

> I wish to share some recent concerns I am having with my 4 y.o. > Many changes in her life..pre-school, Mom back to work, etc….SHe is off > the wall…..I am trying to reassure her, validate her feelings and > staying on top of rules etc…Any tips?? > BTW, I am a single parent..her Dad lives far away and has little contact

Been through this… routine seems to help mine. Yes, things have changed, but some haven’t etc. Special time regularly, like story time at night, can be very reassuring. Sharing details of the day, so she knows where you are and what you’re doing. Positive outcomes of change for her? (from work, money to do things you need/like; from pre-school, friends to visit, new skills, more independence?) FWIW Clytie — Pete & Clytie Riverland, South Australia

Response:

> I wish to share some recent concerns I am having with my 4 y.o. > Many changes in her life..pre-school, Mom back to work, etc….SHe is off the wall…..I am trying to > reassure her, validate her feelings and staying on top of rules etc…Any tips?? > BTW, I am a single parent..her Dad lives far away and has little contact > THANKSTry to maintain as much structure from your pre changes lifestyle as you

can.  Its hard to have time for everything but it helps to have a regular time to spend doing something happy together.  This is not the quality versus quantity time arguement.  Your child needs both.  For us we built a time after dinner to play a game together, read a bed time story etc. The dishes sat in the sink until after the kid was in bed.  She will be reassured by the anticipation of whatever routine you can manage.   By the 4 years olds ARE off the wall.  I loved 2 and 3 but Four was Aaaarghhhhh!  But if you meant that in the real sense, children with emotioinal problems behave the same as normal children, just more extremely.   That what my kids therapist told me when I had him evaluated at 4.  If shes extreme and not just a pistol, an evanulation couldnt hurt.  It could be addressed before school years make it worse.  Good luck.  Hope this helps.  CED

Response:

I wish to share some recent concerns I am having with my 4 y.o. Many changes in her life..pre-school, Mom back to work, etc….SHe is off the wall…..I am trying to reassure her, validate her feelings and staying on top of rules etc…Any tips?? BTW, I am a single parent..her Dad lives far away and has little contact THANKS

Response:

-I wish to share some recent concerns I am having with my 4 y.o. -Many changes in her life..pre-school, Mom back to work, etc….SHe is off the wall…..I am trying to -reassure her, validate her feelings and staying on top of rules etc…Any tips?? -BTW, I am a single parent..her Dad lives far away and has little contact Oh dear.  How hard for you!  I’m sorry, I don’t know any single parenting tips, but I’m wishing you the best.  I would suggest that you make sure you have a pleasant routine.  Ryan always seems to do better when things are routine, rather than always changing.  This is hard for me, because sometimes I just can’t follow my own routine due to medical reasons, but in that even I try to talk to him about it, and I think he understands. (I suffer from depression, so sometimes I just can’t get up the energy to do the things I know I should do.)  In these cases Dad is a huge help.  I’m sorry I don’t have anything else to offer, except for good wishes.  I hope you find some more useful methods that will help your daughter.   Good luck. — Peace… Val