Pure Parents

Question:

Thank you , all of you who responded to my earlier post…Tristan was fine after the hot, humid weather subsided….now, it is almost 31C again, humid as anything, and he is *tired* again…(grin). so, it really was the weather! Whew!!! Just giving him lots of extra fluids, cuddles, and staying indoors..Come to think of it, I feel tired, too…. Alyson in hot, humid, hazy, HELLISH Hamilton, Ontario (tired) mom of Sarah, 15, Michael, 13, and Tristan, 17 months….

Response:

>    My wife and I are trying to decide the best time to try and have our >second child.  Our daughter is already 22 months.  We had originally planned >to have another when she was about 2 1/2, but then had second thoughts.  The >problem is that we are having so much fun with her right now!  At the same >time, we want her to have a sibling without too great of an age difference. >We would like to know what different age gaps this group recommends and what >problems and/or benefits there were.  This may help us decide whether we >should get started right away or wait a while longer.   Thanks. >Vance McAlister

Funny that you should post this because dh and I have changed our minds so many times since Lexi was born abut when to have another one! Originally, before Lexi was even an idea, 2yrs apart seemed great, but after having one, that feeling changed! Lexi is 25mo old now. We have just recently started seeing ourselves with another child (have to get pg first We also are enjoying Lexi so much that we wonder how we can love another child as much as Lexi or give up time with her for a very demanding newborn. Last month we travelled to Chicago to visit all our relatives whom we don’t see very often since our transfer to Houston. Lexi played with her cousins (3, 4-1/2, 4-1/2, 4-1/2, and 8-1/2) She had such a blast with ALL of them (regardless of age) and still keeps saying " Go Cody’s house ‘morrow" Even though she has a playgroup w/kids here, there must be something different that a child senses about a relative. I would assume a sibling even more so. DH and I just melted every time we saw all the kids playing together and decided that we were ready to try for #2. We may not have felt this way so soon, however, had we not transferred here and still lived only a few blocks from all the cousins. Sorry if this didn’t help much, but I guess I’m just saying any age difference can result in a close sibling relationship. You both have to be ready, and also, you get at least 9mo to get used to the idea of another baby coming! Take Care! Denise

Response:

>We had originally planned to have another when she was about 2 1/2<

If you’re sure you WILL do it, then don’t wait to try.  We wanted 24 months difference and we indeed had a due date exactly two years after our first’s birthday, but we had two miscarriages and wound up with 38 months difference.   Spontaneous abortions are a lot more common than folks who’ve never had them would guess.   – Ron Low Levity is the dearth of gravity.  Brevity is the height of clarity.   non-commercial e-mail always welcome

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