Pure Parents

Question:

I wonder if anyone else disagrees with the post below?  I think it’s selfish to wake up a child of any age out of a deep sleep just because the parent is "disappointed" and had to work late.  I know I wouldn’t appreciate it if I were the one awakened.  Children need to have their own routines, based on their own needs, and regular sleeping and eating times would seem to be important. Deborah – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > WAKING UP BABY > Reprinted from 199 QUESTIONS PARENTS ASK > by Dr Grace H Ketterman, Fleming H Revell Company, 1986 > Question:  Sometimes when I come home late, after a long > day at work, I’m disappointed to discover that my three- > month-old daughter is sleeping.  I’m often tempted to wake > her, just to play and be friendly, and I admit sometimes > I’ve done just that.  Is it harmful to interrupt her sleep > like this?  If I don’t I could go for days without seeing > her when she’s awake. > Answer:  Frankly, I’m delighted to have a question like > this.  It reflect similar questions that I’ve had recently > from young fathers, and I am hopeful that this is an > indication of a trend in our society.  By all means, Dad, > awaken the baby and enjoy her to your heart’s content.  She > needs the bonding with her father, just as much as she does > with mother.  Dads have a different approach with children, > and they help to balance out the more tender and gentle > handling that mothers provide.  Enjoy your little girl.  I > would recommend that you change her diaper and clean her > up.  Feed her and play with her all you like and then put > her back to bed. >      I would suggest that you be aware that this child’s > mother may be a bit tired after taking care of her all day, > and it wouldn’t be quite fair for you to have the fun of > playing with the child and then expect Mommy to quiet her > down and get her back to sleep!  You may give Mother a > break as a matter of fact, by taking care of the child and > getting her ready for bed for the night.  I would suggest > that you and the mother together work out a schedule that > will eventually coincide with your working hours.  It’s > wonderful for Dad to come home and give the child a bath.

Response:

> I wonder if anyone else disagrees with the post below?  I think it’s > selfish to wake up a child of any age out of a deep sleep just because > the parent is "disappointed" and had to work late.  I know I wouldn’t > appreciate it if I were the one awakened.  Children need to have their > own routines, based on their own needs, and regular sleeping and eating > times would seem to be important. > Deborah >lengthy post snipped<<

Deborah. . .    I agree with you! I’ve seen what a poor or unsettled routine can do to a young child, and it’s not pretty! It’s too bad the Dad in this case can’t spend the evening with his daughter. . . but perhaps it’s his priorities that need realigning, and not his daughter’s sleep-times. Is working late more important than the parental contact he seems to be missing out on? These are the questions I’d be asking myself in this case.    Of course in the short term he may have no choice but to work late. . . but I think it’s really selfish to drag the baby out of it’s much-needed nighttime sleep.  Good Luck with the Parenting thing. . . Greg Lubianetzky

Response: