Pure Parents

Question:

My son has grown up with his stay at home Mom and myself. He is not spoiled, naturally generous, very kind and the joy of our life BUT I am growing concerned at his lack of ability to handle pain of any kind. This otherwise near perfect boy still goes to extremes crying when he gets an "owie". He has been challenged with a gymnastics course, swimming lessons, etc and is not spoiled at all. He does recieve  lots of love and has never been spanked because it was not necessary with him. I am worried that when he gets to kindergarten in September he will be bullied. Have thought of karate lessons. Any input would be appreciated. Lest anyone jump to the conclusion, we are not people that think a boy should never cry but this is a question of degree.

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> My son has grown up with his stay at home Mom and myself. He is not spoiled, > naturally generous, very kind and the joy of our life BUT I am growing > concerned at his lack of ability to handle pain of any kind. This otherwise > near perfect boy still goes to extremes crying when he gets an "owie". He > has been challenged with a gymnastics course, swimming lessons, etc and is > not spoiled at all. He does recieve  lots of love and has never been spanked > because it was not necessary with him. I am worried that when he gets to > kindergarten in September he will be bullied. Have thought of karate > lessons. Any input would be appreciated. Lest anyone jump to the conclusion, > we are not people that think a boy should never cry but this is a question > of degree.

I’m guessing that he’s 5 or 6, since he will be starting kindergarten?  All of that depends on the child and how you and your wife have handled his owies…. it is my experience that if you don’t make a "big deal" out of a little owie, then they won’t either.  What I usually do (and always have done) with my soon to be 5yr old daughter is let her gage my response.  I mean that if she doesn’t freak out, neither do I…or if I see that she is fine as in after a fall…then I will say ok — hop up and brush it off… Not at all saying that I am not right there checking…I just scale down my panic in order to teach her  that it’s not such a big deal and owies aren’t always a reason for hysterics…. On the other hand, if your son really isn’t used to getting owies…I mean if he doesn’t fall a lot or skin a knee or get a bruise (in other words, he’s more coordinated than most growing almost schoolers  then he wouldn’t know how to deal with the pain.  In that instance I am no help to you…I may be the mom of a girl, but damn she’s just as rough and tumble as any boy I’ve ever seen….owies are our life   lol!!!  Band-Aids and antibiotic cr